rupturing

this morning i ran.

well, actually i walked and jogged.

i don't recall it completely. because as much as i tried to keep my mind stayed on one thing. any one thing. i couldn't. i struggle with being present, especially to myself, especially when life is shaky. some things i remember though, like the many greens rupturing from hard concrete and thick bark. the dull aches of tiredness and confusion. a woman in pajama pants riding a bike. heat radiating from my body. hundreds of cars filled with busy people whose faces i did not see but whose cars i heard. breathing in frosty air - icicles melting down my throat.

but i did it.

i may have cut through the grass at one point. tips of my adidas doused in morning dew.

but i said i would and i did.

::dance::

i am going to do this again.