so brave

i have read maira kalman's book three or four times since purchasing it against my budget's will in december. i reread it again this week, this heartbreakingly confusing week. and i keep coming back to this quote starting at "how are we all..."

sorry and proud. this is precisely how i feel this week. 

there is so much to weep over.

there is so much to relish in.

"what to do? what to do?" i wonder.

save our souls.

could a garden come up from this ground at all?

in light of yesterdays events this question is both

-allatonce-

my sincerest hopes and doubts.

oh, lord save our souls.

i am grieved by what i know.

i will be out

small things have been overwhelming me today.
instead of getting into the details here is a brief list:

car is in the shop.
noise.
unwanted company.
noise.
inability to work due to noise.
noise.
stranded at home.
noise.
tense friendships.
noise.
finances.
noise.
parental strife:
lectures and misunderstanding.
noise.

today i have been irritable and frustrated.
one day i will be out of this house.
a year maximum - better job, more money.
sigh.