im 19.

its crazy to think (and much harder to accept) that i am only 19. i've spent my whole life with older siblings, older friends,  older everyone. and a week ago i realized, with the help of michael, that i expect myself to accomplish what only an older person can. i don't need to rush God. or push His plans for my life. i try to hurry Him up and i nudge Him hoping He catches my drift. all this time, being defined by what i am doing and who i am with. completely consumed with to do lists and filling up my planner with dates and deadlines. i'm 19. and God's plans reach far beyond this year. and His plans reach far beyond me. so to be defined by what i am doing and who i am with is just missing the point. i need to be defined by Him - duh? to be stacey. not stacey and so and so. or stacey who's going to do this or going to achieve that. and that applies to my closest friends, to my dreams, to my ministry. i am 19 and i am slowing down and i am falling in love with my Saviour. daily. over breakfast in my backyard. on my way to the antique store. standing in line for mint chocolate chip ice cream at rite aid. intentionally seeking Him, in His fullness. entirely engaged when He speaks and reveals.